Why does marriage exist? Let's throw out the Biblical explanation for it and instead look at what marriage really means in today's society. In all honesty, it doesn't seem like it means much anymore. Other than surface benefits like tax breaks and health insurance, how much more value does the act of a wedding and signing legal documents give to a relationship between a man and a woman?

More than 50% of the people I know are divorced. Many of them are remarried and seem much happier the next time around than they did the first. It's almost as if that first time was just practice and you're supposed to take the painful lessons you learn from that experience and apply them to your next one to make it better. That's great, but what is it exactly that makes it better the second time around? I'm sure it has some to do with maturity, particularly for those who got married the first time around at a younger age and thought they knew everything. Once those rose-colored glasses came off and they saw their immediate situation for what it was, life didn't seem so peachy anymore.

So with that said, I'm sure almost everyone can agree that marriage and relationships in general are not easy. They are full of compromise and sustaining the ability to understand each other. All people have some capacity for being able to do those things, but the difference is the actual want and desire to do that for someone special. Also, does anyone really want to grow old alone? I know I don't. I need someone to wipe my ass when I'm 80 years old and in diapers.

I had an old boss once tell me that when you switch jobs you are basically trading one kind of shit for another kind of shit. I suppose you could look at relationships the same way. Then, when you finally find someone whose shit you can tolerate better than anyone else you have met, you decide to settle down. Unless someday their shit starts to really stink and you end up going through the big D.

I've begun to believe that there are some people who really do not possess the capacity to be with only one person for the majority of their lives. These people aren't necessarily commitment phobes, but just ones that need constant stimulus and variety in the form of others. They find too much enjoyment in discovering other people and the traits they possess that make life seem more fun and interesting. I'm sure that if there was a person who existed who could do all these things for them, they would be more willing to settle down. However, part of the appeal seems to be the chase and the discovery. It's almost like an addiction.

I think I'm one of those people. I really want to believe in true love and at one point in my life I thought I had it, but there are things about myself that I need to come to accept. There is still the possibility that I'll change and maybe it's my current situation that is making me feel this way. I have a longing for stability yet at the same time there is that tugging feeling that there is still a world of people out there waiting to be discovered.